Dark Passenger: Intellectual Leather (#14)

Like everywhere else, Washington, D.C., and Baltimore both included a bar named "The Eagle" (at least, at the time). So the Leather Community didn't seem foreign. As I emerged from the end of my mourning for an eight-year relationship going kaput, I fucked a lot. And I realized that I loved to bareback.

Condoms bored me. When I would meet a hot guy and then slip that tube of plastic around my rock-hard cock, I noticed an immediate change. While performing never seemed to be an issue, the connection between me and the man I impaled also became broken. The muted sensations just failed to allow me to sense the man completely, even from an emotional level.

When the bottom allowed it, I'd fuck raw and it seemed if our pleasure intensified at an exponential value, even with a one-time, five-minute fuck.

Knowing I still lacked complete emotional control, I assessed the situation around my ex-partner. What had brought us to the point that a split seemed his only desire?

I am extremely laid back when it comes to matters of monogamy or other such societal constructs. Despite the intensity, you might detect in my encounters and my writing, I could give a flying fuck whether my partner at the time got his ass fucked by one or more guys in a night. Even more, I found it turn on to hear his stories of dancing until the wee morning hours and then getting fucked by a last-minute trick.

As it turned out, he was the one out of control. He felt somehow personally harmed that I would fail to indulge him by spending Thursday, Friday, Saturday, and Sunday nights out on the town. His extroverted tendencies could not be contained and I somehow stymied it by allowing him to indulge while I chose my own quiet fucks at home or in more intimate settings.

His chaos versus my order.

That construct began forming the basis for my venture into the Leather Community, one that I still respect to this very day. Spending time on multiple websites and researching the information available, I knew I didn't fit any mold or even come close to the perception of what a Dominate would be.

I politely call myself a geek, but in fact, it seems among the most accurate. I could never be a bear. I don't have enough hair. My muscles are largely for daily use and not worked out with bulk and girth we all seem to find beautiful. The closest I came to Leather clothing probably was a winter pair of gloves.

The Dominate's strength needed to come from somewhere, though. While submissives admit their place in the world to submit, I knew something would have to put them into their place. I likely couldn't physically force them. Short of some weapon, I couldn't snap someone into their place.

Or could I?

I began to think of my brain as my muscle. That I knew was well worked out and could, at a twist of a phrase, snap someone into attention and, with some subtle orchestration, bend people to my will.

When I spent more time studying the Leather Community and, indeed, speaking to those intimately involved, I would discover the truth behind the facade. Many felt the way I did. Leather as a lifestyle rather than the ultra-masculine drag shows with leather chaps, combat boots, and bearded bears.

While the code of conduct within the Leather Community enticed me, I also rather liked the control within a relationship. There wasn't a commitment, there was a contract. This contract outlined the expectations of each party. I would never need to negotiate the conditions of whether someone went out or someone stayed home. The details were clearly outlined.

At the point of my departure, that was my perception. I conveniently forgot that with everything involving humans, entanglements would come no matter how clearly outlined in a document.

But at the time with not-so-innocent intentions, I plunged on at full force.

As with anything I choose to do, I attempt to make an impact. With plenty of sexual experience, I crafted myself into the type of Dominate I wanted to be: Intellectual.

With a few chosen words and finely crafted profile on a website that no exists, I stepped into my Dominating role. As unassuming as my physical stature might be, I let my brain lead. Heart played little if any role. And my cock continued its own hunger for ass. Raw ass. All the time.

Darkness, it turned out, provided the perfect cover.